How I Loved You
by Chihiro26
Summary: Kirk loved her then and he loves her now. Nothing can change that.
1. The Prologue

**So _Infuriation_ has hit a little bit of a snag...if anyone has any ideas or things they want to see happen with that I would very much appreciate it if you'd share. Haha And thank you to the many reviews, favorites, story alerts, etc. that I have already received. They're the reason I keep trying.**

**Anyway this is just an idea that popped into my head. Something to hopefully help my writer's block and to entertain you as well. So enjoy!**

**Btw, this is all in Kirk's point of view. And I do NOT own any of this. I only own little Timothy. Hehe XD**

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In the beginning I spent my days watching her from afar.

She was beautiful, smart, funny…she was perfection.

I worshipped the ground she walked on.

But she didn't know it.

To her I was the farm boy…the dumb hick who "slept with farm animals".

To her I was no better than the dirt under her feet.

But I was so much more than that.

Underneath my womanizer exterior was a lover.

And boy did I love hard.

Boy did I love _her_.

Not a day went by that I didn't think about her…that I didn't wonder about her.

There were many times when I called out her name while with another woman.

_Uhura._

Because she was all I wanted. All I _needed_.

And I could never get her off my mind.

But to be honest, I wasn't trying to.


	2. The Beginning

**And here is chapter two. I'm pretty proud of this work so far. It's just flowing out of me like word vomit. But good word vomit I hope. Haha. Anywayz I hope you enjoy!**

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Everyone knows our back story. We met in a bar in Iowa, then again at Starfleet Academy. I was so obviously in love with her…she could care less. I made a game out of guessing her first name. Needless to say, I sucked at it. But her name was African for god sake! How was I supposed to get that?

Anyway, I got her to be my communications officer for my 3rd Kobayashi Maru and not long after that the Narada incident happened…on the bright side of it all, I finally learned her first name. _Nyota._ Too bad it was from Spock who was whispering it to her as he kissed her goodbye…geez did that sting. But not worse than the sting of losing so many people and an entire planet! Spock is a very strong man…I doubt anyone else could have handled that as gracefully as he did. Even if he is half-Vulcan, the other half is pure human.

So after that mess I became captain of the Enterprise. We left for our 5 year mission with optimism in our minds and a sense of adventure in our souls. No one was more excited than me. I was captain of the Federation flagship and the woman of my dreams was sitting mere feet from me. So what if she was still with the "green blooded hobgoblin" as Bones liked to call him. She was still _there_. And I was content in worshipping her from afar.

But I wouldn't have to for much longer.

A few months into our mission they broke up. For awhile no one knew. They had always been the picture of professionalism on the bridge so there was no difference there. No you could only tell if you squinted. The stolen glances were gone. So were the lingering touches. Not to mention how they never ate with each other in the mess anymore. So needless to say it was over, and they both seemed fine about it. To this day I don't know what happened between them…

But what can I say? One man's loss is another man's gain right? And I did gain. I gained a lot.

I took my time with her. She wasn't just a one night stand. She was someone to be loved and cherished…someone to protect with my own life. Plain and simple, I would _die_ for her.

She was hesitant at first I as I expected her to be. She did hate me for 3 years and my reputation still preceded me. But in time she grew to love me and for the first time for as long as I could remember I was truly happy. Nyota Uhura was finally mine.

Throughout the course of that first five year mission we stayed together. And on our 5th anniversary I proposed to her in the very bar where I'd "accidentally" groped her all those years ago. Her "yes" was music to my ears and a year later we were married. Soon after that she was pregnant with our first child. A boy. Timothy Sentwali Kirk. She told me "Sentwali" meant "bears courage". She went on to say that she named him that because she hoped that our son would have even the slightest bit of my bravery. It was what she loved most about me. When I asked her why she thought I was so brave she said very simply, "you asked me out". A small smile crept onto her lips as I laughed. I told her I loved her, and she replied the same. I had no idea I could smile that wide.

We took him home to our apartment in San Francisco where the Enterprise was docked between missions and there he met his grandparents. Nyota's parents were very pleased with his name of course. Her father exuberated pride while her mother beamed with joy. Little Timothy gurgled as his grandparents teased him.

That night someone knocked on our door. Nyota and I were confused as we weren't expecting anyone. I went to open the door to reveal Christopher Pike. When he noticed the surprised look on my face he simply said "I've come to see my grandson." Needless to say I was touched. Nyota stood behind me beaming as she brought Timothy up so Chris could hold him. He stared at the boy as we ushered him inside and showed him to the living room. Finally Christopher looked up at me and said, "You did good son. Real good." Then he paused and added, "And I know without a doubt that he would think the same thing." I just nodded, too happy for words. Chris turned his attention back to Timothy and I turned mine to Nyota who had placed her hands on my shoulders. She kissed me before saying, "That's one smart man, that Christopher Pike."

Later that night Nyota and I stood over our son's crib and watched as him as he slept. It was amazing how breathtakingly gorgeous he was. His mocha colored skin was now my second favorite color. My first being the deep red of Nyota's uniform.

He had eyes shaped like his mother's but as for their color he took more after me with a magnificent shade of dark blue gracing his irises. He didn't have much hair yet but you could still tell that it was dark brown in color and a little curly.

Just from looking at him I could tell that I had without a doubt fallen in love for the second time in my life and one look at my wife told me she had done the same.

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**AN: "Sentwali" really does mean "bears courage". I looked it up. Haha! And Timothy came from me wanting him to have a 'T' name like Kirk having Tiberius. But Sentwali Timothy Kirk didn't sound as good to me. lol Besides parents usually make the more exotic names the middle names. Again like Kirk and "Tiberius". Hah little Timmy has that in common with his dear old dad. XD**


	3. The Discovery

**I apologize for the wait. My Original plan was for this story to be only 3 chapters but it doesn't look like that will be happening. It seems as if this story has taken on a mind of it's own. Anyway, I'm nowhere near happy with this chapter but really I just got tired of looking at it. Maybe you guys will find some sort of hidden charm? I doubt it. Hopefully I'll be able to update faster and the next chapter will be much better...I just have to re-storyboard it. haha**

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The next ten years went by in a blur. Timothy was now 10 years old and becoming more like me every day. But not the mature captain of a ship side of me. Oh no no no Timmy was more like 11 year old Jim. You know the one that drove an antique car off a cliff. But luckily he wasn't too out of control. Unlike 11 year old Jim, he knew when to quit. And he was brilliant. Destined to be an engineer for the federation I could tell. He'd spend hours upon hours hanging out with Scotty talking about the ship and lending him a hand every now and then. Timmy even started to pick up a Scottish accent he hung out with the man so much.

Our second child, our daughter Jayla Teresa Kirk was 7. The third love of my life she was an amazing child. Smart and beautiful just like her mother. She even had an incredible natural talent when it came to languages. She was like her mother's clone with slightly upturned eyes and long dark hair, though she never wore it up. She had the same skin complexion as her brother and she had my eyes as well. Nyota had always talked about how much she loved my eyes, maybe she'd secretly wished for our children to have them too.

We were nearing the end of our 3rd five year mission aboard the _Enterprise_, the last mission being the most exciting by far. But of course having too young children along for the ride didn't make it any less…well awesome. Over the years since that very first voyage we'd discovered 5 new planets, 9 new species and many more things. Bones even found a new disease and a cure for it in little over two years. So needless to say the _Enterprise _was on a roll and her crew was just as excellent as she was.

So many things were different from the way they had been fifteen years ago. Of course Nyota and I had gotten married and started a family. McCoy had gotten custody of his daughter Joanna and the little girl had been living with us for the past eight years. She was gorgeous with blonde hair and her father's brown eyes. Her and Timmy were close friends even with the four year age difference as Joanna was now 14. I was pretty sure my son had a crush on the girl too…his first of many. It was certainly a milestone.

Spock had married his betrothed T'Pring during our second mission. The two had one child, a daughter whom they named for Spock's mother Amanda. Very untraditional of course but us humans had rubbed off on Spock and T'Pring as well. Little Amanda was just like her father too. Cool, calm and collected at all times she rarely showed emotion even though she was at the age when emotion was all you got from a child. Usually it was in the form of some sort of tantrum.

Chekov had grown into a fine young man. No longer was he the doe-eyed 17 year old he'd once been. Pavel had grown to be a strong and smart 32 year old man. Boy did the years fly by. He was like a second son to me and I'm sure the rest of the bridge crew felt the same. We had all watched him grow and had had a huge part in his development. One day on the bridge McCoy came up to me and pointed at Chekov while saying, "We did a good job with that one huh?" I just laughed and told him to go back to sick bay but I knew he was right.

So if you haven't guessed by now it's been a long time. Nyota and I are no longer in our late 20's but are now in our late 30's. But I don't feel old, not yet, and Nyota hasn't lost it. Even though her hair is shorter now, it's still long and she still wears it up when she's on duty. But off duty it's down and flowing. She's still just as vivacious and beautiful as she was the day I met her. Her wit is still biting and her tongue is still oh so talented…but enough about that. I should tell you about how wonderful she is at being a mother and she is very wonderful at it. I don't think I've ever seen anyone handle two small children with the grace that she manages to do it with. But Nyota has always been graceful. Another thing I love about her.

And I've aged too you know. My hair has lightened a shade or two and I've been told that my eyes seem to be "graying with stress" from certain people…but my wife tells me that I'm still as strikingly handsome as I used to be. To her not a thing has changed. See how remarkable she is?

But everything wasn't always hunky dory. We lost a lot of good people over the years…I guess it was to be expected. Starfleet is definitely not the safest profession but it doesn't make the loss of some good people any easier to deal with. My mom died too. And to this day I can't tell you how I feel about it. We'd reconciled about two years after Timothy was born and she'd turned out to be a good grandmother. I used to sit in while she would tell the children stories of Grandpa George…it was great to see the way there eyes lit up when she told them of their bravery. But it felt even better to see their proud smiles when people told them about me.

One day in particular will stay with me forever…but not for the best reasons. The night before had been electric to say the least. Nyota and I had gone to bed completely drained of energy for the 5th time that week. But we weren't complaining. I remember her turning towards me and curling into the side of my body. She looked radiant. Her hair was matted down from sweat and her cheeks were rosy in color. But her eyes were breathtaking. There was so much emotion in them that night that it was overwhelming.

I remember her placing her head on my shoulder as she lazily traced circles on my bare chest. I groaned and shifted, wrapping an arm around her waist and kissing her forehead. She laughed quietly before placing her hand flat on my stomach and looking at me. "I love you." She'd said. And I don't know why but it alarmed me. Something about it felt different and I was suddenly taken over by this need to protect her. From what I didn't know, but I was on alert.

I pulled her closer to me and she buried her face in my neck. I told her I loved her too, more than she'd ever realize. I could feel her smile against me and I calmed down a little. But I was still worried.

The next morning started like any other. We got the kids ready for their day and Nyota and I headed to the bridge. It was quiet that day. Nothing major. But my crew had grown to appreciate the calm so there were no groans or complaints like there would've been 15 years earlier.

Then Nyota informed me of a message from Pike. We were given a mission to beam down to an uncharted planet. Ramun IV. We were to search the planet and record any information we could. As far as Starfleet knew the planet was uninhabited but we were to be ready for anything.

So Spock, Bones and I beamed down. It was to be a routine mission and it started as such. Bones took readings on plant life while Spock checked out the atmosphere among other…sciency things.

That's when I noticed a strange beam of light coming from a mountainous region east of us. After taking a few readings we were able to establish that the beam was not atmospheric. _Someone _was causing it. But why? What was its purpose?

After a quick talk with Spock I had Scotty beam us aboard. We had no idea what we were dealing with but there was an agreement amongst the crew that whatever it was had to be investigated.


End file.
